Rebuilding Connections

The other day, my students and I went to visit an old friend of mine, Master Mark Preader. He operates a West Coast World Martial Arts school in Hollister, and he was kind enough to open his school to us in order to share a sweaty workout with both old and new friends. (Thanks KJN Mark!)

I've been making a concerted effort to reconnect with people who have been a part of my martial arts journey. In this case, I would have never met Mark were it not for visits like this, because we trained at different schools under different instructors. It warms my heart to be able to share experiences like this with my students, especially because mine were so valuable to me.

For a while, I had lost sight of this. When I was operating my school, I became mired in the day-to-day work (my lack of business mastery at the time) and I began to withdraw from the larger martial arts community, including all of the friends that I had made along the way. As I became more proficient with the business, I had formed a habit of keeping to myself.

In the past few years, I've come to realize just how much I've needed to reconnect. It inspires me to push for excellence because I see the different ways that my friends and peers have created excellence in their lives, and it broadens my perspective. It also inspires me to become more compassionate and understanding, since everyone's journey has been unique and full of their own challenges and victories.

Most importantly, it's reminded me of the value of my connections because they've all been a part of making me who I am today, and also because building bridges to link people is far more useful than building walls to separate them.

Alone in a Crowded Room

All of the usual 4th of July events that I attend are happening tomorrow, so I'm taking a day for myself today. After a bit of hiking, I stopped for a cup of coffee and some websurfing at the local spot.

While floating around on the web, I came across this tribute to our soldiers, and I felt a sense of loneliness come over me - not for myself, but for every soldier who might want to be hanging out at someone's BBQ.

I thought I'd share the video with you. Enjoy your holiday.

I Lost Some Stuff

As a child, when I used to tease my mother about losing her keys, she smiled and told me that someday, my memory would start to play tricks on me, and I would begin to lose things too.

And look at me now! Now I'm losing stuff left and right. The thought of it makes me smile.

Most recently, I've noticed that in the past 56 days, I've lost 12 pounds. I'm not even the slightest bit concerned. I don't know where they went, and I don't even plan on looking for them. They can stay gone. (The first few pounds always go quickly. It's just water weight, but it still feels good.)

I have also lost the ability to walk around in my current wardrobe without a belt. When this happens, my pants begin to collect around my knees like some of the local kids. I don't mind this either. Soon enough, I may lose some money and find some smaller pants, but I guess that comes with the territory.

I can't seem to find my appetite for fast food and greasy diners these days. It used to be a source of post-traumatic comfort, but I suppose there are worse things that I could be losing.

I saw my mom the other night and she asked me how I was doing. I told her about my upgraded workout schedule, the running, lifting, sparring, training, and hiking. Then I told her about the ever-present soreness that I've been feeling, but how happy I've been to be losing so many things.

Now my mother thinks I've lost my mind.

Mom was always right.

Time Out For What Matters

I visited my cousin in the hospital today. She's begun treatment for Type-B large cell lymphoma, and it's tricky because she's also six months pregnant. Today, I set aside plans and made sure to stop by to comfort her and to help her pass the time as she waits in bed for the stream of medical personnel to perform tests and observe her reactions.

She's in good spirits, and for this, I'm glad. However, I think a part of me also realized that I often get too caught up in my daily routines and forget to share time with family and friends. Holidays, weddings, illness, and funerals shouldn't be the only times that I see my relatives.

In my own process of developing myself, I need to expand my awareness and my consciousness in layers. This begins with myself and expands outwards. I cannot skip layers of social consciousness and claim that I'm some kind of role model, if all I've done is to support noble causes by sacrificing quality connections with family and friends, or by ignoring my responsibilities at work, etc. I need to balance all of these things.

I need to evaluate the way I prioritize my time so that I can begin to share more time with those who are closest to me. That's what this boils down to.

Update 6/7: My cousin was discharged from the hospital today. She gets to go home. Yay!